Pride. Still my biggest problem.

My pride is invisible to me until God wakes me up to this evil. I mourn my evil for which I am solely responsible. The destruction of relationships. The lost opportunities for good. The obviousness of the right way I didn’t see, or didn’t choose, depending on how honest I want to be with myself.

I need to respect other people’s ability and right to think through conflicts themselves and make their own decisions. I need to ask questions, gently offer what may not be known, not force conclusions.

I believe my insecurity and fear of rejection of thoughts I hold dear fuel my illogical lack of listening and lack of gentleness and lack of consideration of those I am trying to lead to experience new conclusions. The more I push the more the push back.

I think part of the solution is seeking Jesus. He directs me, opens doors to relationships, opens hearts to His truth, and has been conspicuously not invited in my struggle. Maybe if I had been depending on Jesus I would have done less struggling and more serving with more success for Jesus, others and me?

Author: james bruce mcnaughton

I became Seriously Mentally Ill at age 18, ten years later I got and took the right meds, I accepted Jesus, and my recovery began. View all posts by james bruce mcnaughton