First of all, I take full responsibility for my actions, or rather lack thereof. I have not trained much in the last four weeks or so. Even though once I start to walk, I love to walk, and I love the feeling when I am done; I haven’t won the battle in my mind of getting out and starting in about a month.
I really don’t understand this.
I have been filled with the fear of walking or rather the pain of walking. And I know that this fear comes from satan and all I had to do was take one step (pardon the pun) toward walking and the fear would dissolve into the lie it is . . . But I chose not to take the step that would have led to freedom from my fear. I chose “safe” failure.
If I don’t finish the 13.1 miles in a week from today it is my own fault . . . It is not satan’s fault, because I have not been tempted beyond what I am able to resist. With the temptation, Jesus has provided a way of escape (just walk outside and start) so that I might be able to bear the temptation. I can’t say along with Flip Wilson, “The devil made me do it!” Or, rather, not do it.
If no one else has benefited from this experiment of faith and lack thereof, I have benefited. I know what it is like to try something far beyond my comfort zone and have initial success. And I know what it is like to cave to fear when success is in sight.
Now, only Jesus can get me across that finish line. Please pray for me. But, more importantly, pray for the water carrying kids. I can fail and go home and have clean water right in my home.
They cannot.
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For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith. 1 John 5:4
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Thank you again Carlos!
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